A walk to remember
by Bu T Ful Baby
Summary: The time after Jamie's death. Will Landon get through it?
1. Default Chapter

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A walk to remember

_The time after her death _

Chapter one: Risen

A pool of his tears wet his black suit, and, as he looked up, ran down his cheeks and blrurred his vision. A grey nothingness was all he could see, for now his life was worthless. He knew it was going to happen, he knew the emotional dammage was going to come sooner or later, but never, never had he thought it would hurt this much.

A cold hand lay upon his shoulder, but Landon couldn't feel anything. He was senseless as they lay the coffin in the hole that, to him, didn't seem worthy enough of such an exquisite body. Her body. Her heart.

He bowed his head to hide his grief. If god could do this to somebody who was pure of heart, who had no wickedness in her, what hope was there for the rest of us? That question toiled with his mind. There was no hope.

'No", he thought. 'She would not want me to be like this'. He lifted his head high and smiled. Not out of pleasure, not out of satisfaction, but for his love. For Jamie. She would want him to live on in his life. To live it, just as well as he would've with her. To go out and find love again. To find joy and hold it to his heart for ever, and ever. For ever, and ever.

The priest said his final words, and then signaled for the men to fill in the now occupied hole. Landon's mother pulled him toward the church, but he shook her off. He wanted to spend some time alone with Jamie. He knew he would still be able to hear him, because she was probably looking down on him right now, smiling. He looked up at the blackening sky and smiled. It was almost as if he could feel her beautiful eyes stare back at him as one singular raindrop fell on his eyelash.

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	2. The first of her

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Chapter two: The first of her**

He sat through his class motionless. A faint sound of people walking down the stairs and out of the room was at the back of his mind. His thoughts, which now seemed to be the only thing that could make Jamie feel real again, were interrupted by Mr. Mckee, (who had been minding Landon with a close eye of the past few weeks). "Son… Son!" Two rough hands shook him hard, and Landon's eyes opened. "Son, you've been sitting there not even looking at me through my whole class. Would you kindly tell me what your problem is?" Landon didn't asnwer, but instead grabbed his bag and ran out the door. Mr.Mckee shook his head. "I don't know what's going on in that boys head", he mumbled.

Landon hated the way his teacher called him son – it reminded him of his dad. He had been at the funeral because Landon and Jamie were both thankful when he got that special treatment for her when she had fell ill a year ago. But the funeral had been 1 or 2 weeks back. Landon's dad liked to think that his relationship with his son had moved forward, but Landon wouldn't forgive him for abondoning his mother and her.

The front of his old house was plain and simple – no elegance or grace. Just plain jib boards and iron roofing. As he knocked on the front door ( a door that needed serious re-painting), he glanced behind him. It was very quite, almost too quiet, and he almost imagined Jamie standing at the gate, smiling at him. He blinked a few times, but the image wasn't gone. Jamie, in that same pink cardigan he had bought her when they were still in high school, waved and then beckoned him forward. She turned and walked, all the while looking back at him, straight in his eyes. Landon reached forward and followed her. By the time he had opened the front gate, she was halfway across the road. All in one second a car, speeding, hit Jamie. Although, it didn't seem as if it hit her, but that she vanished into thin air just before it did.

"Noooooo!" cried, and he bounded forward to the spot where she had dissapeared. He felt around him, turning in circles.

All the while, his mother had watched from the front porch with a worrisome eye. Something had to be done, she thought to herself. This was not her son.

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	3. The diagnosis

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Chapter three

_The diagnosis_

"Who's this?" Landon asked as he entered the living room. A bald, fat man looking every bit a shrink, sitting on the end of the couch, looking Landon up and down, surveying his every move. Some thought he could make a diagnosis just by looking at the person – that's why Landon's mother had called.

" This is Dr Hemroide", she said, getsuring to the man. Landon started to laugh, but the look his mother gave him shut him up. Landon felt like a little kid, even though he was about to open a beer can he had been impatiently waiting to open and sat down.

"He certainly has a sense of humor", Dr Hemroide said as he got out a pen and paper. He turned to face Landon, and judged his communication poorly before he asked him a few questions.

"……So how long has it been since she passed away?" The question Landon had been dredding. He didn't understand why he had to see a shrink – there was absolutely nothing wrong with him. Besides, he was a growing man, and he didn't think his mum had to call a shrink just because he had been a little out of the ordinary.

"3 or 4 weeks", he shrugged. He looked at the clock hanging above the doorway. "I've really got to go- another class".

Landon stood at the door, expecting to shut the door behind Dr, but the man just stood there and asked if he could have a private word with his mother. Landon sighed and concentrated on finishing his drink. He stood, the can vertically suspended over his mouth as he heard muffled whispers coming from the kitchen.

"It may be too early to say", the Doctor started "but I think we're looking at depression". Landon crumpled his can in his fingers, and a drop of blood fell on the floor. He heard his mother start to sob, and he braged into the kitchen and looked everyone in the Doctor in the eye. Sympathetic eyes stared back at him. Landon didn't want pity. Right now he felt angry, not depressed. He wanted to punch the doctor right in the face and run off. He couldn't face it any more. He slamed the door behind him, got in his car and drove.

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	4. Life on the edge

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Chapter Four

_Life on the edge_

The long, open road was beckoning him to drive faster. To claw his way to the horizon. Even with his sunglasses on, the orange glear that swept across the plain was still visible.

He turned the radio on loud, making sure that the voices in his head telling him to turn back were blocked out. He started swurving along the road, in time with the beat of the heavy metal that pumped through his ears. It didn't matter though- there were no cars out there anyway.

As the song ended, he stopped the car on the side of the road and stepped out onto the dusty gravle. He leant against the bonet of his car, put his hands behind his head and tried to soak up the remainders of the sun. It wasn't long before the traffic picked up on the road. Mainly old, dirty trucks; obviously used to seeing loners on the side of the road.

Landon didn't bother to look up as the beams of light from each car landed upon him and then moved on. In the beginning, as it started to fall dark, he had been paranoid that one of the cars was his mum's. Sometimes, he secretly hoped that the passing car or truck was his mum, hopelessly looking for her son. But as it turned to complete darkness, and Landon decided he was too cold to stay on the bonet any longer, he realized his mum wasn't coming to look for him. Noone was.

He was past grief as he turned the car on. Anger now filled his every sense. Landon drove as fast as he could, skidding around the corners that came more frequently as he climbed cornered his way into the hills. He laughed a high, cackle. He turned a right corner, going over the centre lain. Big birght lights lblinded his vision, and, in between a mouthful of swearing and a screeching of brakes, everything went black.

The on coming car skidded and got the full force of Landon's car on it's left side. The driver didn't bother to think about the steep drop at which his car was pushing Landon's. At the very last minute, he turned the other way and crashed into the side of a cliff. Landon was already balcked out to know that his car was hanging over the edge of a murderess drop.

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	5. Chapter 5

Chapter five

Landon's mum had always hated the hospital. But now she didn't care. She just cared about getting through the traffic. She started tapping the steering wheel as she waited for the light to flash screen.

"Look at that man," she said to herself, glaring at the people who were crossing the road in front of her. "He doesn't care that my son is in HOSPITAL!" This time she screamed it, tooting the horn for the people to get out of the way. The man she had been commenting about turned and looked at her, laughing. 'MOVE' she mouthed, glaring at him. His eyes opened wide in surprise as she revved the car, threatening him.

As the man moved out of the way, she pushed on the accelerator so hard that she bonny hopped her first few metres before speeding off.


End file.
